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By Kevin Guilfoile

CULTURE

God or No God The Morning News

New Fathers Roundtable Part III The Morning News

New Fathers Roundtable Part II The Morning News

New Fathers Roundtable Part I The Morning News

The Man Who Was Hook The Morning News

MetaFilter In the Ruins The Morning News

The Non-Expert's Desk: Buttons The Morning News

The Non-Expert's Desk: When in Rome The Morning News

The Half-Assed Handyman The Morning News

Case Studies in Feng Shui Sweet Fancy Moses

Crossing Over McSweeney's

I Am a Bad eBayer Modern Humorist

Casual Fan Fiction The Morning News

Mary Astor Spit Peanuts McSweeney's

A Message From Lovey Johns-Atchison, Acting President of the Trump Place Condo Association McSweeney's

It's a Shame About Ray Modern Humorist

The Darva Conger FAQ (with John Warner) Modern Humorist

A Review of Cirque du Soleil's "O" at the Bellagio Hotel Las Vegas Elicited Through Regression Therapy Hypnosis McSweeney's

How I Voted in the Weather Channel's Top Ten Storms of the Century Poll McSweeney's

One Man's Struggle: Seven Letters to the Editor of the New York Times The New Republic

I Have Always been Good at Multiple Choice McSweeney's

My Own Private Everything mMode Magazine


LITERATURE AND ART

Cast of Shadows Tour Diary: Chapter One The Morning News

Cast of Shadows Tour Diary: Chapter Two The Morning News

Cast of Shadows Tour Diary: Chapter Three The Morning News

The Indignant Correspondence of Folksy Ken Oakley The Morning News

Bienvenue au Musée Renteria The Morning News

Surrey With the Syringe On Top The Morning News

The First Rule of Book Club The Morning News

Art Test McSweeney's

Review of T.C. Boyle's "After the Plague" Hartford Courant

The Britney Papers (with John Warner) Modern Humorist


POLITICS

The Guilfoile-Warner Papers Part V: Obit The Morning News

The Guilfoile-Warner Papers Part IV: A Week Away The Morning News

The Guilfoile-Warner Papers Part III: Master Debating The Morning News

The Guilfoile-Warner Papers Part II: Improving Kerry The Morning News

The Guilfoile-Warner Papers Part I: Flip-Flops and Conventions The Morning News

The Columbia Letters (with John Warner) The Morning News/Modern Humorist

John Ashcroft's College Football Preview The Morning News

Choking the Pretzel NPR's "On the Media"

Journeys with George (with John Warner) Modern Humorist

Gored! The Moore/Sheen Letters Salon

HTML-Al and Dubya Dubya Dubya: Navigating the Virtual Worlds of the Presidential Candidates (with John Warner) Business 2.0

Smile. Relax. Doodle. Notes From the Presidential Debate (with John Warner) Modern Humorist

Alternative Deathstyles Modern Humorist

My First Presidentiary


MUSIC

The Non-Expert: Not Fade Away The Morning News

I Know You're Lonely For Words That I Ain't Spoken The Morning News

The Indignant Correspondence of Folksy Ken Oakley The Morning News

Beyond American Pie: Interpreting Allegory and Symbolism in the Other Songs of Don McLean McSweeney's

"What To Do With FM Radio" Commentary (requires Real Audio) NPR's "On the Media"

Reviews of Bands My Friends Are In: The Offshootz McSweeney's

Reviews of Bands My Friends Are In: MiddleEarth McSweeney's

Say Hello to the Master Siege Control (A short fiction serial)


PHILOSOPHY AND RELIGION

The Non-Expert's Desk: The Wedding Party TMN

Does Santa Claus Exist? The Morning News

Transcending Spaces The Morning News

The Utilitarian Ethicist Part 1 Dezmin

The Utilitarian Ethicist Part 2 Dezmin

The Utilitarian Ethicist Part 3 Dezmin

Catch a Falling Catholic The Morning News

Pascal's Wagering The Morning News

Norse Legends Reference Pages McSweeney's

Jesus, What Now? Modern Humorist


MADALYN MURRAY O'HAIR IN HELL

Madalyn Murray O'Hair In Hell The Morning News

MMOHIH: The Mystery of the Antenoran Chant TMN

MMOHIH: The Secret of the Burning Canvas TMN

MMOHIH: The Mad Minister From Circle Six TMN


VERSE

Done In Pen, Again: More Poems By New York Times Puzzle Editor Will Shortz McSweeney's

The Non-Expert's Desk: Poetry For Your Girlfriend The Morning News

Scary Stories (The Basement Prayer) The Morning News

Spam Poet The Morning News

Done In Pen: The Poetry of New York Times Puzzle Editor Will Shortz McSweeney's


SPORTS

John Ashcroft's 2002 College Football Preview The Morning News

How to Explain the Rules of Cricket "Manual" collection

The WWF Investor Relations FAQ Opium Magazine


OPINION

The Pop-Off King The Morning News

I Know You're Lonely For Words That I Ain't Spoken The Morning News

What Are You, Drunk? The Morning News

The Mediator on Gay Marriage The Morning News

"What To Do With FM Radio" Commentary (requires Real Audio) NPR's "On the Media"


McSWEENEY'S BRAIN EXPLODER (as Carlton Doby)

How You Gellin'? McSweeney's [Answers]

Celebrity "Phil" in the Blank McSweeney's [Answers]

"...And Stay Tuned For St. Thomas Morgantown" McSweeney's [Answers]

Long Distance Song Parody Dedication: Cherry Pie McSweeney's [Apology]

The Ransom Note McSweeney's [Answers]

GubernatoriAlyssa Milano McSweeney's [Answers]

Serial Fillers McSweeney's [Answers]

Spooky Halloween "Phil" in the Blank McSweeney's [Answers]

An Errant Spelling Production McSweeney's [Answers]

You're the Topps McSweeney's [Answers]

On Screen Chemistry McSweeney's [Answers]

Old-Timey Blurb Action McSweeney's [Answers]

Outfox(x)ing the Competition McSweeney's [Answers]

Complete Brain Exploder Archives


BOMBING WITH JAI AL-LENO (with John Warner)

"Osama takes the Taliban restriction against trimming your beard so seriously he's issued a fatwa against Tom Cruise for cutting off Nicole." Modern Humorist

"Over in the football stadium, they had to postpone the Taliban's Seventh Annual Marching of the Women Who Have Committed Adultery and Shooting Them In the Back of the Head Festival. You should have seen the dress Bjork was planning on wearing to that."
Modern Humorist

"Seems like they have the CIA and the whole US Army over here and they haven't been able to find a single, high-ranking member of al Qaeda. On the other hand, yesterday, Osama got four Eddie Bauer catalogs." Modern Humorist

"The 53rd Annual Emmy Awards were this week. I tell you, a thousand Salman Rushdies typing for a thousand years couldn't come up with anything as offensive as this..."
Modern Humorist

"Eight feet square. Chain link all around. Three meals a day. A couple of towels. In Kunduz, we call that a DoubleTree." Modern Humorist


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